Note to my readers...
10:45 a.m.

first off, i know that this main page is getting rather long and don't worry, i'll have that fixed by next week. i'll also include a link for you guys to post your comments alongside mine. confused? let me clarify:

say i were to post something about that judge judy looking chick on *spoken in a british accent* "Yoooouuuu, are the wikist link", you can click on "post comments" and express your mutual hatred, tell me to kiss off cause you think she's hot, or just say whatever the heck you wanna say. sounds good? k.

also, a few people have taken the time to leave comments (via the form on the left) and I'd like to say mucho gracias. BUT! (yeah, there's always a but) i'd like to know, "where are the e-mails?" Don't you like me anymore? Of course you do, so come on...send me some email. Just say hi, tell me that you like/hate the site, beg for money, tell me i'm the father of your child...anything!, just send me some e-mail. i am a reader feedback whore so please abuse me.

oh, and to the person that told me that my site was great but I need to, "get rid of the pansy blue." sorry kiddo, the blue is here to stay...until i think it looks pansy that is.

These should keep you guys busy:

1. Unfair competition at it's best!
2. What you do in life, comes back to haunt you.
3. Is your hand steady enough to win?

Also, I've noticed that no one has been downloading the Matt Coutts series of flash animations on my media page. Trust me, they're funny! Oh, and the Bruce Lee Series. You guys don't know what you're missing. If you've got a high-speed connection (hopefully not viacsucks), then you should have no excuse not to download em.I'm on 56k (vipowerless unfortunately), but the downloads didn't even take that long.

Must I beg? You're kidding right? I'm not gonna beg. Really. Not this time at least...

i think i'm learnig to cope with this life stuff. i have quite a few valid reasons to be grumpy today but i'm not gonna get all worked up. i'm going to be in a happy mood today. there's already enough killing in the virgin islands.

last night i spent seven hours straight debugging my first program for my c++ class. i am by far, not a programmer but i hope to get into it so that i can mingle with those programming d00ds. i'm amazed at how fast i'm progressing cause i'm already exhibiting programmer traits. the late night programming sessions. having a computer as a girlfriend (no sex till marriage tho). living off of pizza and soda. a quick note about that...don't ever eat a large pizza by yourself. there IS such a thing as pizza poisoning and after five slices, i think i'm done for. my stomach still feels horrible and the funny thing is, guess what i'm gonna eat tonight when i go home? come on, sing along kids!

*sings*
diarrhea cha-cha-cha, diarrhea, cha-cha-cha
if you're sitting in a pool and you feel something cool
diarrhea cha-cha-cha, diarrhea, cha-cha-cha
if you're walking down the street and something's dripping down your feet
diarrhea cha-cha-cha, diarrhea, cha-cha-cha
if you're sitting at your puter and your butt begins to spewter
diarrhea cha-cha-cha, diarrhea cha-cha-cha

And it continues...
10:10 a.m.

like Brain of Pinky and the Brain always asks, "when will the hurting stop?" That's the question i ask myself every single week. crappy day after crappy day. it's only 10:00 and i'm already totally pissed off. here's a recap of my frustration:

last night - 8:00 p.m.

i already had to wince thru two and a half hours of class with a teacher who sounds too remarkably cool to not be fake. he's like, "you don't have to take notes and i won't test you on anything that we cover in class." i'm like, "slap me silly and call me susan!" what does he mean by, "don't take notes." i mean, i usually don't take notes, not only because of my unique style of learning by reverse osmosis, but also because of my life threatening tunnel carpal syndrome (hey, if i can't type, i can't go online & if i can't go online, life is practically over for me). anyhow, after class, i stagger down the stairs eager to go home and eat my chicken flavored cous cous (yuk!), and when i get to my car, the mofo won't start. i won't go into details but i'll just say that me and that car are gonna fight and if you saw Rat Race, my car will wish that it had bought a squirrel.

this morn - 8:30 a.m.

i wake up and hurry to make a cd for my patna, and my sumumabitch computer keeps giving me errors. ever since i upgraded to windows 2000, my cd burner has been making tons of coasters. argh!!! piss me off, piss me off, piss me off! i've owed him that cd since last week and my computer refuses to work with me. i've already tried pleasing it physically and bribery with a linux install only infuriated it more. rest assured, its life was also threatened.

still fricking morn - 9:00 a.m.

i go into the car and my radio won't play. not wanting to deal with it, i said fuhgedaboudit, and decided to start my car. it starts....yaaay! i go to pull up the handbrake and guess what? i drove off merrily and went to work. yeah right! when i lift the handbrake lever thingy, my bracelet gets caught on it and shatters into an entity more unrecognizable than a speech from our local governor. i then proceed to take about twenty minutes to put it back together but i'm sure you know what i'll say next...the damn thing refuuuused to reassemble. fuxor! i threw it in a container and went to work.

still morning - 10:00 a.m.

i did about 90 mph on the highway in a futile attempt to murder myself and hopefully a few innocent bystanders on my way to work. don't worry, i'm not suicidal cause i can't die. homicidal? now that's a different story. but now i'm in a better mood cause my coworkers have been mentally molesting me all morning and it feels great. now that i've had a few good laughs and heard a few orifice office jokes, i'm ready to begin my day. but i swear, i wish something else WOULD go wrong...i'm telling u, someone, is going to be unlucky enough to find out what i can do with some twine, a porno video, and a butane lighter.

Why, why dammit?
4:40 p.m.

today has been a really crummy day for me. i seem to have been having quite a bit of those lately and it really sucks. when will people believe me when i say that bad things tend to always happen to good people? i'm not making this stuff up. case in point:

i think that god likes to make an example of me whenever i say or do something bad. in one of my earlier posts, i was making fun of chinese food and our local chang wang, excuse me...chinese restaurants. well, today i decided to eat at one that i've never visited before. oh brother, what a mistake!

today i played brave and ordered fai'd waice (u know that's how they pronounce it) and "chicken moo goo gan pan". aside from the fact that i can hardly pronounce the thing and that it sounds like baby talk for a chicken with mad cow disease, it didn't even look like chicken. anyhow, that's not even the bad part...first i didn't know that mushrooms had hair. well, at least mine did. to top it off tho, i found the longest piece of human carpeting i've ever found in a plate of food. i almost puked. i almost puked. no, really, i almost puked.

i found this somewhere and i just thought i'd share it with you:

ODE TO CHINESE FOOD

DID YOU EVER THINK WHEN YOU EAT CHINESE,
IT AINT PORK OR CHICKEN BUT A FAT SIAMESE
YET THE FOOD TATSES GREAT SO YOU DONT COMPLAIN
BUT THATS NOT CHICKEN IN YOUR CHICKEN CHOW MEIN
SEEMS TO ME I ORDERED SWEET AND SOUR PORK,
BUT GARFEILDS ON MY FORK, HE'S PURRIN HERE ON MY FORK
THERES A CAT IN THE KETTLE AT THE PI KING MOON
THE PLACE I EAT AT EVERY DAY AT NOON
THEY COULD FEED YOU CAT AND YOU'D NEVER KNOW
ONCE THEY WRAP IT UP IN DOUGH
EGG ROLLS R DA BOMB! I WANTED MORE
BUT I HEARD WANG DIALIN UP HIS BUDDY AT THE OLD PET STORE
I SAID NOT TODAY I LOST MY APPETITE
THERES TWO CATS IN MY BELLY AND THEY WANT TO FIGHT
I WAS SUCKIN ON A ROLAID AND A TUMS OR TWO
WHEN I SWEAR I HEARD A NEW VOICE AND THAT IS WHEN I KNEW
THERES A CAT IN THE KETTLE AT THE PI KING MOON
I THINK I GOTTA STOP EATIN THERE AT NOON
THEY SAY THAT ITS BEEF OR FISH OR PORK
BUT ITS PURRIN THERE ON MY FORK,
THERES A HAIRBALL ON MY FORK

i was just here sitting at work, and I decided to check my site statistics. to my amazement, more people visited than I expected. realistically, I didn't think that I would get any more than about 20 mistaken, drunken-type stupor related clicks onto my page, with about 18 of em being myself.

to get to my point, i just wanna say a quick thank you to everyone that stopped by yesterday and made nostaljack.net's grand opening a success. it may not be much of an event in the eyes of most people since i only got about fifty visits yesterday but, being the accomplished underachiever that i am, this was a monumental event.

to think of it, that's more visits than i get at my house a year. damn, that's more times than i get off my computer and mingle with society a year. wtf?, that's more times than I have ever seen a girl na...uhm, err, nevermind. where was i? oh yeah, thank you so much for visiting ya'll.

remember, for every visit that this site gets, a pound of haggis gets donated to a hungry, malnutritioned, disease-infected young boy. no not me dammit, another hungry, malnutritioned, disease-infected young boy. so, do humanity a favor and bookmark my site & get your pets sprayed or neutralized (or whatever). That is all.